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Jacobs, W. W., 1863-1943

"Night Watches Complete Series"

We both put our 'eads over the counter to see wot had
'appened to 'im, and 'e started making the most 'orrible noise I 'ave
ever heard in my life. I wonder it didn't bring the fire-injins. The
actor-chap bolted out as if he'd been shot, and I was just thinking of
follering 'im when the landlord's wife and 'is two daughters came
rushing out and asking me wot I 'ad done to him.
"There--there--was two of 'im!" ses the landlord, trembling and
holding on to 'is wife's arm, as they helped 'im up and got 'im in the
chair. "Two of 'im!"
"Two of wot?" ses his wife.
"Two--two watchmen," ses the landlord; "both exac'ly alike and both
asking for 'arf a pint o' four ale."
"Yes, yes," ses 'is wife.
"You come and lay down, pa," ses the gals. "I tell you there was," ses
the landlord, getting 'is colour back, with temper.
"Yes, yes; I know all about it," ses 'is wife. "You come inside for a
bit; and, Gertie, you bring your father in a soda--a large soda."
They got 'im in arter a lot o' trouble; but three times 'e came back as
far as the door, 'olding on to them, and taking a little peep at me.
The last time he shook his 'ead at me, and said if I did it agin I could
go and get my 'arf-pints somewhere else.


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