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Howells, William Dean, 1837-1920

"The Elevator"

I suppose every one really
expects an elevator to drop with them, some day, just as everybody
really expects to see a ghost some time."
MRS. CRASHAW: "Oh, my dear! what an extremely disagreeable subject
of conversation."
MRS. CURWEN: "I can't help it, Mrs. Crashaw. When I reflect that
there are two thousand elevators in Boston, and that the inspectors
have just pronounced a hundred and seventy of them unsafe, I'm so
desperate when I get into one that I could--flirt!"
MILLER, guarding himself with the fan: "Not with me?"
MISS LAWTON, to young MR. BEMIS: "How it DOES creep!"
YOUNG MR. BEMIS, looking down fondly at her: "Oh, does it?"
MRS. CRASHAW: "Why, it doesn't go at all! It's stopped. Let us get
out." They all rise.
THE ELEVATOR BOY, pulling at the rope: "We're not there, yet."
MRS. CRASHAW, with mingled trepidation and severity: "Not there?
What are you stopping, then, for?"
THE ELEVATOR BOY: "I don't know. It seems to be caught."
MRS. CRASHAW: "Caught?"
MISS LAWTON: "Oh, dear!"
YOUNG MR. BEMIS: "Don't mind."
MILLER: "Caught? Nonsense!"
MRS. CURWEN: "WE'RE caught, I should say." She sinks back on the
seat.
THE ELEVATOR BOY: "Seemed to be going kind of funny all day!" He
keeps tugging at the rope.


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