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Wood, Eugene, 1860-1923

"Back Home"

The apparatus trundles
off, the bells dolorously tolling as the striking gear on the rear
axle engages the cam.
Who is this weeping man approaches, supported by two friends, that
comfort him with: "All right, Tom. You done noble," uttered in
pacifying if not convincing tones? Heart-brokenly he cries: "I dull
le ver' bes' I knowed, now di' n't I? Charley? Billy, I dub bes'
I knowed how. An' nen he says to me - Oo-hoo-hoo-oooo-oo! He says
to me: 'Come ou' that, ye cussed fool!' Oo-oooo-hoo-hoo-oo-oo! Smf!
Lemme gi' amma ham hankshiff. Leg go my arm. Waw gi' amma hankshifp.
Oo-oo-oo-hoo-hoo-oo-oo! Fmf! I ash you as may wurl - I ash you
as may - man of world, is that - is that proper way address me?
Me! Know who I am? I'm Tom Ball. 'S who I am. I kill lick em
man ill Logan Coun'y. Ai' thasso? Hay? 'S aw ri. Mfi choose
stay up there, aw thas sec - aw thas second floor and rescue
fel-cizzen's propprop'ty from devouring em - from devouring emlement,
thas my bizless. Ai' tham my bizless, Charley? Ai' tham my bizless,
Billy? W'y, sure. Charley, you're goof feller. You too, Billy.
You're goof feller, too. Say. Wur-wur if Miller's is open yet?
'Spose it is? Charley; I dub bes' I knowed how, di'n't I, now?
Affor that Chief come up thas stairway and say me: 'Come ou' that,
ye cussed fool!' Aw say! 'Come ou' that - 'Called me fool, too!
Oo-hoo-hoo-oo-oo-oo!"
"Hello, Dan! Hurt yourself any? (That's Dan O'Brien.


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