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Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander), 1882-1956

"Second Plays"

Now my suggestion is
this: that you should disguise yourself as a beggar woman and approach
each of the three princes in turn, supplicating their charity. In this
way we shall discover which of the three has the kindest heart. What
do you say, my dear?
QUEEN. An excellent plan. If you remember, I suggested it myself
yesterday.
KING (annoyed). Well, of course, it had been in my mind for some time.
I don't claim that the idea is original; it has often been done in our
family. (Getting up) Well then, if you will get ready, my dear, I will
go and find our three friends and see that they come this way.
[They go out together.
(As soon as they are out of sight the PRINCESS comes back.)
PRINCESS. Well, Woodcutter, what did I tell you?
WOODCUTTER. What did you tell me?
PRINCESS. Didn't you listen to what they said?
WOODCUTTER. I didn't listen, but I couldn't help hearing.
PRINCESS. Well, _I_ couldn't help listening. And unless you stop it
somehow, I shall be married to one of them to-night.
WOODCUTTER. Which one?
PRINCESS. The one with the kindest heart--whichever that is.
WOODCUTTER. Supposing they all three have kind hearts?
PRINCESS (confidently). They won't. They never have.


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