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Milne, A. A. (Alan Alexander), 1882-1956

"Second Plays"

She is walking across the hall to the drawing-room
when MR. KNOWLE comes in from behind her, and she turns round.)
MR. KNOWLE. Were you looking for me, Alice?
ALICE. Yes, sir. There's a gentleman at the front door, sir.
MR. KNOWLE. Rather late for a call, isn't it?
ALICE. He's in a motor car, sir, and it's broken down, and he wondered
if you'd lend him a little petrol. He told me to say how very sorry he
was to trouble you----
MR. KNOWLE. But he's not troubling me at all--particularly if Peters
is about. I daresay you could find Peters, Alice, and if it's not
troubling Peters too much, perhaps he would see to it. And ask the
gentleman to come in. We can't keep him standing on the door-mat.
ALICE. Yes, sir. I did ask him before, sir.
MR. KNOWLE. Well, ask him this time in the voice of one who is about
to bring in the whiskey.
ALICE. Yes, sir.
MR. KNOWLE. And then--bring in the whiskey.
ALICE. Yes, sir. (She goes out, and returns a moment later) He says,
thank you very much, sir, but he really won't come in, and he's very
sorry indeed to trouble you about the petrol.
MR. KNOWLE. Ah! I'm afraid we were too allusive for him.
ALICE (hopefully). Yes, sir.
MR. KNOWLE. Well, we won't be quite so subtle this time.


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