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Dunne, Finley Peter, 1867-1936

"Mr. Dooley Says"

Thin he gives her a boat ride in th' park, takes her to th'
theaytre, an' th' next mornin' she wakes up with hardly anny sign iv
her indisposition.
"But th' kind iv vacation I take does ye some good. It is well within me
means. In fact it sildom costs me annything but now an' thin th' thrade
iv a customer that I give a bottle iv pop to whin he ast f'r a gin sour,
not knowin' that at th' minyit I was whilin' me time away in th' Greek
islands or climbin' Mount Vesoovyous. I don't have to carry anny
baggage. I don't pay anny railroad fares. I'm not bothered be mosquitoes
or rain. In fact, it's on rainy days that I thravel most. I'm away most
iv th' time. I suppose me business suffers. But what care I?
"In th' autumn I am pretty apt to be shootin' in th' Rocky Mountains. In
th' winter I am liable to go to Florida or to th' West Indies or to
Monty Carlo. I'm th' on'y American citizen that iver beat Monty Carlo. I
plugged away at number siventeen an' it came up eighty-two times
runnin'. 'Tis thrue I squandhered th' money on th' fickle Countess de
Brie, but aisy came aisy go. Me disappointment was soon f'rgotten among
th' gayeties iv Algeers. I often go up th' Nile because it's handy to
th' Ar-rchey Road. I can get back befure bedtime.


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